6. STUCK

Once in your life you started on a path, you had energy, you were inquisitive and everybody you met recognised this, that is how you got that job, that recognition, that skill, but you wanted more, you wanted to learn how things were done where you were, you wanted to dig deep and you did, you went deeper found the secrets of the trade and started to apply them got a few promotions, then you looked up and saw new paths and flows and you wanted to climb up to get into the flow…now it has been sometime and you are still down there! ‘stuck’, ‘stuck’ in the dumps!

How to identify if you are in the dump:

Nothing is fun anymore. You look around for something to look forward to, something fun doing by yourself or with others and come up empty. You cannot find a low on anything yet you can see things, event planned by others all over the place but nothing takes a bite on you. Work feels like a grind, but you keep plodding away.

Your energy is low, you are not hyped enough to do anything, even meeting up with friends out of your way feel a chore, you start looking for things to do that take the least effort, maybe you are just full up you say to yourself

You feel worse in the morning and better at night. You start appreciating going home more that setting out in the morning and on your days off you just do not feel like doing anything, you just sit, eat, drink and watch tv, or go on social media to see what others are up to!

You have simmering resentment toward others. Sure, you are still doing what everybody asks of you, but you stew in anger the whole time. You are jealous of and bitter toward people who look happier than you feel.

Your self-talk gets harsh. You say nasty things in an effort to spark yourself up but nothing, in fact , you start believing your harsh criticism.

You feel distanced from people around you. It is hard to have genuine, intimate conversations because you have to keep up this front that you are alright.

You deprive yourself of creative work time. This helps you exert some control and stirs up feelings of suffering that are perversely pleasurable.

You notice a significant mood change when you have caffeine or alcohol. A cup of coffee might make you feel a lot more revved-up and optimistic. A glass of wine might make you feel really mellow and even happy.

You feel like you are wasting your life, especially looking around you and noticing your friends or people you know are doing, and instead of feeling challenged to improve, you lean more on “What’s the point? Why should I keep going?”

How to get ‘unstuck’

Less than excited about dragging yourself in to the office this morning? Perhaps you are ‘stuck’ in a dump! Just feel things aren’t going the way you’d planned.

You are not alone. Sometimes it is the boss/colleagues dumping on you and you feel all you do is process sh*t and move it on!  Or too much repetition in the workday. Traits that make us great people can sometimes hold us back at the office, like if you are specialised on a task no one will want you to move on, you become your very own victim. Or like being too hesitant to take risks or think big.

So you are bored out of your mind and cannot see an obvious next step. You might be ’stuck’ behind an ungrateful boss, or perhaps you have just been doing the same job too long.  No matter the details, that feeling of ‘‘stuck’’ is there and this is draining, leaving you feeling no hope for your career or your future.

You need first to change your mind set – It all starts with you, you need to realise that how you view situations makes or breaks you, remember the same boiling water softens a potato and hardens an egg.  It is simply how we interpret situations that determine our outcome in them. Your first challenge is to escape the negative mind-set that is enveloped you.

Whatever it takes, create brief periods of time, an hour or an afternoon, when you practise irrational optimistism. Just picture yourself as an incredible success, perhaps five years from now. Until you foster some optimism, you will be forever blind to the many possibilities that await you and are on you path.

Create your bucket-list of jobs. Make the longest possible list of dream jobs. These may not be your next job but are jobs you would love to have and do try doing this over a period of time and treat it like your own secrete, add to it as you think on it. As your list grows, you will find you are removing, adopting and changing those jobs then look for patterns. Are you drawn to certain types of challenges? Look for clues about what excites you and makes you feel energetic again. This will start to point to certain fields, jobs and situations as your attention is focused.

Like attracts like, Birds of a feather flock together – have you noticed if you want a certain dress or car you tend to see them everywhere? This is the power of focused attention. You will see what you wish to do everywhere, hear about it. It is now that you need to draw up a plan. At some point, create a short version of your list. These are the positions you actually want to pursue, create an action list for pursuing these positions making it as specific as possible.

Taking risks when you face challenges in your career can be daunting. But big ambition demands a willingness to take risk, some small steps can cause incremental changes, but if you want something to be transformational, to change your life, your career, your business, then you need to think big, face down the risk, and figure out how to deal with it. You do not notice changes in cooling water until you have ice otherwise all you have is very cold water but not, ice!

It is easy, and safer to settle for mediocre, but if you want to get ahead of the pack, if you want to be an anomaly, then you have to act like one. Change is only brought about by doing something different from how you have always done it.

So what changes can you start with?

Commit to learning new skills. Embrace risk, this will help you to overcome the fear of failure, try to be creative in your spare time, you might even uncover unforeseen opportunities and this will help your self-confidence to grow.

But we have to ask ‘Why do we feel ‘stuck’ in the first place?’

It is the way we react to circumstances that determines our feelings. Remember the egg and potato in a boiling water? One comes out soft and the other hard!

We have all felt like we are drowning in mud, you feel ‘stuck’, worthless, and confused. You want to move, you should, you have to. But you cannot.

And then it evolves into anxiety, fear, and overwhelming.

But what if, just what if, we are not ‘stuck’ at all? Been told if you put a chicken on the ground and draw a straight line from its beak, it remains there thinking it is tied down!

Every year, I have periods where I feel “‘stuck’.” Yet when I look closer, I see that “being ‘stuck’” is a label I give to a natural part of life. It is a time when not much happens. The anxiety comes when I think it should be otherwise. I start to force myself to work, to come up with ideas, and to make things happen. And when I do not get anywhere, I call it ‘being ‘stuck’’.

Being ‘stuck’ is a perception’ You do not drown because you fell into the water but because you did not get out to breath air.

Why We Get ‘STUCK’

You get ‘stuck’ when you think you should be something you are not at the moment.  When you think life should be different than it is. When you find yourself full of words like  ”should,” ”have to,” and ”must” this is how you slowly construct your own imaginary prison

Being ‘stuck’ is like quicksand. The more you try to get out, the deeper you sink.

My mind wants to push, control, and manipulate. It stems from insecurity. I want to be secure, be loved, and be remarkable. I think that if I could just control life, all would be well.

It is not until I face reality that things begin to lift. Here are three things I do:

Give up in the knowledge you cannot change things as they are at this very moment, no matter how hard you try .This is because this moment as it is, is an accumulation of all you have been doing before, those events, thoughts, deeds have led you to this very moment – it is like not taking a parachute on a planed plane jump, only after you jump you realise you do not in fact have a parachute!  No matter how hard you now try to change events, nothing much will change! Relax, let go the urge to change things now, it will not be long before a conclusion is reached! Either you land on soft ground/ water and you survive to jump again with better preparation or land on hard ground and never know about it as you will be dead instantly.

When you are ‘stuck’, surrender to being ‘stuck’. Surrender to what comes and find a good moment in it or the comfort it will all be over soon!.

  1. Enjoy yourself.

There’s always something you feel drawn to do during these periods of feeling ‘‘stuck’’. You are not completely ‘stuck’, not in every area of your life, right now, I’m into reading books, playing with my daughter, watching movies and TV shows ‘Power’ is amazing. Or on occasion, I’m writing articles like this, expressing what I feel. I do the work I need to do. But then I look for fun in things. It is easy for me to feel guilty during this period because I feel like I’m not doing enough. But I have learned to see that I’m doing the best I can, and I know that in this moment ,I am in, it is perfect. I am who I am. I’m doing what I can do and that is enough for now and for me. And if right now, it means doing less, then that is what I do, knowing the tide will shift soon enough. Nothing lasts forever! Go easy on yourself.

When I try to change what is, I poison myself from the inside out. I have learned to see my resistance as a sign to relax. To see that I can only do my best with what I have, then it is out of my hands. No pushing needed. Life lives itself through me, because I am life.

I am not separate from anything or anyone. I am this planet. I am the stars. I am everything I know and imagine. We just think that life should look different than it does. But the fact that life is not what you think, it is shows that you are wrong.

Let Things Be

Whether you feel ‘stuck’ for a day or week let it be. You do the best you can with what you have. The more you surrender the more you learn when you come out of it.

It is the darkest periods of life that have taught us the most about ourselves remember we say it is darkest before dawn. Learn that life is not all about accomplishing things. Sometimes it is about resting and letting things be. These periods are no different than the seasons. There is sun. There is snow. There is light, and there is darkness. The trick is to learn how to handle all the differences in seasons. Learn to wear a tee shirt in summer, a warm coat in the winter, sunglasses in the sun and bearing a torch in the dark.

Once you let it be what it is, things change because your perception changes.

What may keep you ‘‘stuck’ in Life’

You try to be perfect in other people’s eyes.

If your mom or dad (or both) were perfectionists, you may have heard the phrase, “If it is not perfect, it is not right.” The problem with this is that no one is perfect. No matter how hard you try, you will not always get it right. It is better to let the go of the belief that you must be perfect every time. Why? Because high expectations can kill your spirit. How? By making you frustrated and maybe even depressed. Free yourself from the need to be perfect. It will add years to your life. You can never get it all done. Perfection after all is subjective, find your definition of it and rest in it. You are perfect if you have done all you could have done today with what you had. That is perfect.

You have to please everyone.

You cannot and will not please everyone, sorry. The fact is that some people are happy being miserable. If you continue to go out of your way for others, it will not work. You will not receive credit or any acknowledgement or gratitude for whatever it is you have done. You will only receive a giant headache. Do your best, but do not for a second believe that you must please the people in your life. Remember pleasure is very temporary, what I take pleasure in now will not offer me pleasure in an hour, try laughing at the same joke twice, no matter how good the joke was, the pleasure second time round, is not the same. The only person you can please is you. Work on that and you will never be disappointed.

You feel it is too late for your dreams.

When you were little, what was your biggest dream? Long before you knew about money, what was it, was it to be a nurse, policeman, doctor or a super hero? You may have been told you that you were childish. Why? Because grown up have long given up on their dreams and settled for what they are now engaged in. Dreams keep your life moving forward. No one says that you have to quit your job today, pack up your car and move to another country! Of course, if this is your dream, then go for it. Rekindle your dreams through journaling. Think about what you wanted to become when you were little. Daydream and let your mind wander free. Your dreams may be closer to reality than you think. Dreams do sometimes come true, but for them to do so, we have to first dream them!

You feel you have to stay in a career you do not like.

If you do not like your job, at least be thankful for the income it is providing you and your family. Instead of complaining about it, figure out what you want to do. Make a list of everything that interests you and narrow it down to the top five career choices. You can pursue another career on the side. Feeling gratitude of what you are now doing is the first step to appreciate what you have accomplished after all, once, you were dying to do what you are doing now, all that is changed is that you have grown. Growth is what we are, everything around you is growing, changing, from your face, body, to the universe, the job has not changed hence you want change! Appreciate what you have, look for opportunities to make a change and be sure it will come to you.

You have to spend time with people who are not good for you.

It is true that family and friends could be toxic for you. Even though you try to have a positive outlook and see past their flaws, they could be sucking the life out of you. These people are known as energy or emotional vampires, and you do not have to spend time with them. You can love people from a distance, maybe even get a new set of friends. Have empathy for them in their circumstances. Remind yourself it is not you going through those circumstances hard I know but you being a wreck for them does not help them or anyone all you end you with is a lot of miserable people.

You have to help all the time.

No is word also, remember that. If help is at the expense of your health, your happiness, your peace of mind, then it is a high price for you to pay. Sometimes we think we are helping but we are not actually helping. Evaluate your offers, what you can and cannot do, what is within your capabilities and what is beyond, otherwise you leave yourself needing help!  You cannot be everything to everyone. Help them whenever you can, but do not get sucked into doing it all for all, all the time! Remember, you do not have to be a people pleaser. You can say, “No, and the world will not come to an end!.

You follow the crowd.

Be unique. Even the fingers on your own hand are not all of the same height.  If a certain hair style is in fashion, it does not mean it will suit you, you do not have to wear the same clothes, wear what compliments your body shape. If your friends smoke, you do not have to do the same. It is up to you to make choices for you and your life. And before you make those choices, think of the consequences, or what spiritual teachers refer to as the law of cause and effect. For every cause there is an effect, for every action there is a reaction. The next time someone says to you, “You must or should, know that you have the right to reject or accept their suggestions, you have one life stop contracting it out.

You want to be liked by everyone.

I would like to share a secret with you. Not everyone will like you or want to like you, so get over it. You can be the nicest and friendliest person on the planet but that does not guarantee that people will like you. It is what it is. Instead of analysing why someone does not like you, wish them the best and walk away. Besides, why would you want to hang out with those who do not want to be around you? It is their loss, they will miss experiencing your uniqueness. Surround yourself with people who love and support you. And who knows? Maybe the ones who did not like you last time will grow to appreciate you for you. Remain true to yourself and be you.

Why you are ‘STUCK’

It is not the snake bite that kills you, it is the poison that gets to work in your body. Deal with the poison and the snake bite is nothing.

What it really comes down to is this: how you are living your life right now. Is it in alignment with your true self? If it is not, you are not authentic to you. And being someone else is exhausting and unsustainable. In today’s world, we get non-stop chatter from everywhere, the TV, social media, radio, magazines, newspapers, celebrities, the Internet, our parents, partners, children, family, friends and work colleagues. All these have different voices constantly in our ear about how we should look, feel, live, love, talk, dress, eat, move, work, play, sleep and even enjoy ourselves. We are bombarded with messages about how we are supposed to have our life together, work a respectable job, and settle down have children and oh have a pet or two!

This blether may be well intended or meant to be motivating to help us attain more money, power and status but, regardless of the intention behind it, all these voices do end up being just too much. They drown out our own voice, to be honest you end up not knowing the voice in your head, that quiet innate whisper from within, if, it is, truly yours!. The more we listen to others, the less we know the sound and feeling of our own voice.

It is when you cannot hear your own voice that we become paralysed. You get ‘stuck’ in your rut. Confused and lost. The problem is that we think the answers to those burning questions like “What am I supposed to do?” and “Who am I?” can be found externally. Ultimately, the answers lie within us. We just need to be quiet enough to be able to listen to what we are saying. Not them. In order to step into your big, beautiful life it is essential to be completely, 100-percent you. Your needs. Your truth. Your voice, Your Life.

Once you begin to completely accept and know yourself, you will be able to come back to yourself and reclaim your truth. To do this, you need to silence the voices. The only way to learn what your own voice sounds like is to detach from every other voice out there.

How to know your voice:

  1. Meditate
    Meditation is a love/hate relationship for most, we know from somewhere that it is good for us or we should do it but, either we do not believe in it or do not understand it well enough to do it. To really know you, to put your life in context, it is good to meditate, start light, see, feel, the benefits of being alone, of being quiet, taking time out for you, to just be you.
  2. Journal
    You need to get all those voices out of your head and onto paper to see what is really going on. When the voices are just a swirling vortex of thoughts, it is very difficult to get to the underlying truth. But by pouring that stream of consciousness into actual words on real-life paper, the one obsessive thought will reveal itself, and with it, your underlying truth. Now you are getting to the real stuff and growing.
  3. Have conversations with your heart
    I know this sounds a little weird but we do call it ‘speaking to yourself’ and it works. It is as simple as asking a question and waiting for a genuine answer. When you hear that voice, you will know it is your true and genuine self because it makes you relax and fills you with relief. Ask any question and you will get an honest answer. Sometimes too honest for you to handle, accept it do not try to change it, leave it as it is.
  4. Ground yourself
    When there is too much noise going on, it means your energy is too high in your body. It is all cerebral, ‘stuck’ in your head, and you start feeling disconnected and flighty. To remove this built-up buzz in your brain, ground yourself. The easiest way is by taking a break, go for a walk, breathe into the base of your spine, exercise, sit outdoors for a while. It is all about bringing your energy back down. Try doing whatever relaxes you.

Whenever you feel ‘stuck’ in a rut, look within to see where you are not being totally true to yourself. By using these tips, you will be able to reconnect, find your truth, and get back on track in a way that is peaceful, purposeful and authentic to you.

It does not matter so much what obstacle is blocking your progress. What matters is that you learn to move forward despite being confronted with challenges. You have all the power you need to take the necessary steps to break out of the rut. Everything you need and want is within you. Look within, believe and it is done, have faith and you will move mountains, help is not among men it is within. However, every fibre of your body must be willing to effect this change, know without uncertainty, believe completely. Breaking free from whatever is holding you back. Take this choice and learn to gain more control over your feelings, thoughts, and behaviours and watch miracles unfold in your life.

Here’s what you can do to free yourself

  1. Face your fears

People are unable to move forward because they are afraid.

Whatever we fear limits us. In many cases, fear prohibits us from making any further progress in life. We are afraid of the unknown, which is why we unconsciously sabotage our own development. We learn to accept the situation we find ourselves in. It simply seems more comfortable to remain where we are than to move on. Living a life without risks might seem a logical thing to do. But after a certain time, we become so used to our comfort zone that it will be difficult to ever break free from it. Slowly but surely, we begin to realise that this habit led us to become ‘stuck’ in life.

At some point in life, we simply became afraid of going any further. We gave in to our fears. We allowed fear to stop our progress in life.

If we want to get ‘unstuck’, it is important to change how we perceive our fears. We might not be able to stop being afraid of that which is to come, but we can learn to control our fears, we need to acknowledge our fears, but do not allow them to limit you, seek to confront that which you are afraid of, running away from your fears will most likely make things worse, we all know you cannot run from you debts, you just incur interest! Keep pushing forward in spite of your fears, Do not allow your fear of losing what you have to stop you from moving on, be ready to work for it and it will work itself away.

Everyone on this planet, and I mean really everyone, has fears. It is not something to be ashamed of. Instead, try to think about the worst possible outcome of that which is causing your anxiety. While you think about this outcome, try to realise that even if the worst-case scenario were to happen, you would still be able to find a way out. After all nothing is permanent.

There’s no need to be afraid of failure. Be concerned about not having the courage to try. If you really want to initiate positive change in your life, let go of the feeling that you are helpless. Do not allow your perceived powerlessness discourage you from making a change in your life. Most likely, it is just your fear trying to persuade you to do nothing about your situation.

  1. Break your routine

Feeling ‘stuck’ in life can be the result of unhealthy and restraining routines. Developing a routine can be quite beneficial. It helps you to keep moving when the going gets tough. The development of habits will aid you to do quite complex things with the greatest ease. As such, routines provide you a fundament and structure you can work with.

While it is certainly true that routine is helpful, it can also limit your progress in life. It can develop into restrictive rules and obligations difficult to break. Yet, we willingly abide by these rules, because they give us a sense of security and control. Moving on in life, however, requires us to break the existing structures from time to time. Breaking the rules gives us the opportunity to explore something out of the ordinary. It helps us to discover something new, surprising and exciting. Remember when you started to go to school alone, or when you moved out of home, scary stuff, but you did it, breaking out with the norm with an attitude all will be fine and in the end that is all it is ‘all will be fine’

Expand your horizon. Do something new every day, avoid time-wasting and mindless routines. They prohibit your progress. Routinely break your routine. Make it a habit of exploring the unknown.

Break restricting routines whenever they need to be broken. Overcoming that what you have always done as really important. It will help you to break free from feeling ‘stuck’’ in life. Breaking out of the ordinary allows us to get ‘unstuck’. There is so much to be found outside your usual routine, you will only need the courage to explore it.

  1. Effect change, one step at a time

If you are feeling ‘stuck’ in life, it is important to overcome that which prevents you from moving forward. This might sound simple in theory, but it can become quite a struggle in real life. In fact, most people get overwhelmed by their attempts to break free from a rut. To them, it will seem as if they do everything they can, without ever accomplishing something.

For this reason, it is not so important how much you do, but how you go about affecting change. Make sure to maintain your motivation by keeping a constant level of change. It is better to tackle one problem after another than half-heartedly trying to address everything simultaneously. Not only will the sheer size of the problem overwhelm you, but it could also make you reluctant to truly free yourself.

It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you are moving forward

  1. Overcome the perception of impossibilities

Feeling ‘stuck’ in life can leave us not knowing what to do. It paralyses us and diminishes our ability to see exciting new opportunities. Instead, we feel as if the options at hand are impossible to execute. We are torn between seemingly impossible options.

If every solution you can think of seems impossible to accomplish, you will get even more ‘stuck’. It is an overwhelming situation. On one hand, you want to do something to affect change. On the other hand, everything that comes to mind seems unrealistic or impossible. As a result, you are being pulled apart by multiple options that do not seem helpful to you.

Even though your situation may seem hopeless at times, there’s always something you can do about it. True impossibilities are very rare. It is more likely that you are simply overwhelmed by having too many choices, try narrow them down or detach yourself from the issue and desired outcome to study it well.

As you can see, our thinking patterns can greatly contribute to the feeling of being ‘stuck’. If we think every option we have is impossible, no progress can be made. It is our inflexibility what keeps us ‘stuck’. We might over think the situation in our desperate attempt to maintain control over our life. Remember trying to effect progress is not trying to control the event. ‘Jumping without a parachute, you cannot control that event, it is too late but, staying calm and trying to effect where to land, is still in your capabilities’

Instead of getting trapped by these thinking patterns, try to explore your options. It is very likely that you already know a lot of directions you could move in. If that is the case, try to find the one solution that you like the most and commit to the decision.

  1. Be honest with yourself

Multiple times in our lives we concluded, “My life is ‘stuck’.” Interestingly enough, We did not only know the reason for being ‘stuck’, We also knew deep within ourselves what we needed to do about the situation. The problem was not so much that we could not find a solution. Quite the contrary, there were many solutions and opportunities. We simply could not come up with the necessary courage to implement one of these.

If we do want to break free from being ‘stuck’, it is necessary to be honest with ourselves.

Astonishingly, we almost always have the answer within ourselves. It might take some time to discover it, but it is always there. The problem is that we do not act upon this knowledge. We prefer to keep this answer locked within ourselves.

Have the courage to at least think about the possible solution. It might be challenging to even consider acknowledging that you took a wrong path in life. But ultimately, it might prove to be better than suffering from this decision for the rest of your life.

  1. Change your perspective

When we feel ‘stuck’ in life, we most certainly do not have a good overview of the situation. Unfortunately, the feeling of being ‘stuck’ in a rut can heavily affect our perception of life. Instead of seeing a great deal of the broader perspective, our mind is imprisoned in a tiny little box. It is time to broaden your perspective!

Often times, we get ‘stuck’ in life because we do not allow ourselves to become who we want to be. Instead, we adapt to the role various people expect us to play. We do not like it, but deep down we are convinced that it is impossible to realise these dreams. Time to break these negative beliefs.

Stop walking the same path you have always chosen. Explore new perspectives by taking other paths. Ask yourself what your real goals are. Explore what you are passionate about. Discover what it is that truly energises you. Find your true purpose in life. Challenge yourself to have a vision for your life.

All these things can fuel your motivation in the most astonishing ways. Discovering your vision and the pursuit of your passions can create a powerful drive. It can help you to liberate yourself from the vicious circle of being ‘stuck’. By having the coverage to live your authentic self, you will liberate yourself.

  1. Differentiate between feeling and fact

You feel as if you are ‘stuck’ in life. Therefore, you conclude that you cannot move on. Sometimes, however, our emotions might not be telling the whole truth. The inability to get ‘unstuck’ may feel very real, but in the end, it is just a feeling. And this very feeling creates our perception of the situation.

For this reason, it is important to remind yourself that feelings are not facts. Try to look at your situation more objectively. Emotional responses might cloud your perception of reality. Feeling ‘stuck’ in life could be a response to exaggerated expectations or mere fantasies.

Perhaps, the situation is not that bad after at all. It is simply external influences that make you think you are not moving on with life.

  1. Avoid blaming others

It is relatively easy to blame others when we feel ‘stuck’. While this is a great strategy to maintain peace of mind, it will contribute nothing to the solution of your problem. In the worst case, blaming others will get you even more ‘stuck’.

In almost every situation of life, you will most likely find someone else to blame. This person might give you the substitute sensation of having solved the problem. But in reality, nothing is solved.

Even though you’d like to find an external cause for your situation, try to seek that cause within yourself first. Try to take control over your life by not seeking the fault for your problems in others. That failed attempt for a job, an opportunity, it s not the fault of the successful person, the boss or partner, child, friend etc look within you, fix it so next time you will be the successful one.

  1. Stop comparing yourself to others

While it is a natural tendency to compare yourself to other people, it is not the best thing to do. While we think we compare ourselves in an objective manner, quite the contrary is the case. Our measures are superficial and unfair. In most situations, we take our weakest spots and compared these with people who are above-average in this area.

These comparisons are really not helpful. We are simply too individual to compare ourselves with another. If you are feeling ‘stuck’ in life, try not to measure your life’s worth based on other people’s accomplishments. Measure your life based upon your own standards. Do not just mindlessly adopt society’s definition of success, find your very own. Sometimes all it takes is to stop comparing yourself to other because 9 out of 10 times, we only compare ourselves with those we think are doing better than us, and almost never to those we think we are doing better than. Only the shoe wearer knows where it pinches and unless you walk in another’s shoes, you really do not know them or their life, good enough for you to label yourself not good enough or not progressing forward.

  1. Stop making excuses

Excuses keep us from moving forward in life.

If you really want to do something, you will find a way. If you do not, you will find an excuse. We all know of stories of great feats such as a mother lifting a car to save her child trapped underneath it or in your life, you can recall when you had your back to the wall but you found a way out.

Do not allow excuses to keep you right where you are. Stop trying to rationalise why you cannot get on with your life. Do not focus on all the different reasons that keep you ‘stuck’. Shift your attention to what needs to be done to effect positive change.

In the end, the only one that is holding you back is yourself. Do not fall prey to the mistake of focusing all your attention on lousy excuses. Look for the steps you can take that will get you out of your situation.

  1. Be grateful for what you have

We sometimes feel as if we are not moving forward when we think we have not yet accomplished enough in life. As a result, we are quite frustrated about our situation. If we do not succeed as much as we desire, it can feel as if we are ‘stuck’ in life.

Developing the habit of being grateful can help you to ease the feeling of being ‘stuck’. It helps us to rediscover what is beautiful about our life. Gratitude can also enable us to find what makes our life worth living. As a positive side effect, we spent a lot less time chasing evermore. Instead, we learn to find joy and fulfilment in everything we already have.

Ultimately, this is the way to truly relief yourself from the feeling of not being able to move on. So take yourself some time to count your blessings. Appreciate everything you have been given.

And remember we are truly never ‘stuck’. Nothing, remains still, even a stone withers away. It just appears that way, learn from nature, a worm hardens to become a butterfly, every plant dies to bloom again. The truth is, be still inside, let life be within and not outside, appearances do deceive, be whole and alive inside first and you will never be ‘STUCK’.